I continued my movement balancing the wild swings of the speeding train. I was already tired and exhausted with the journey of past 24 hours. No one appeared sympathetic in the crowded coaches. My passage became increasingly difficult and I started thinking of giving up. I was so much lost in the midst of the running train that I was not even confident of getting back. Suddenly my legs became heavy and refused move further.
My mind acted in sync. It started asking me - Why should you suffer so much? After all, they were not your relatives. They are not even known to you till yesterday. Your job is to reach Delhi and finish the assignments. Why should you get entangled in this mess? There were so many passengers around, but no one was bothered. So give up & get back.
I had decided to walk back. I can comfortably lie down on my berth. I can read the books of my choice. I can listen to the music of my like. I can get lost deep in my thoughts.
But someone deep inside my soul did not agree. It started arguing “What will happen to your commitments? How will you face the man who is stooping under pain? What will happen to your assurances given to the hapless lady?”
I stood breathless with my thought process under siege. There was a duel happening in my mind. The fight was intense.
I decided to have a glass of water. Even that was difficult!
I had slowly moved to the wash basin. Come what may, I stood in front of it and gulped enough water from the tap. I washed my face and hair & splashed water to the eyes.
That was quite refreshing. I felt much better. The power of water appeared tremendous! Some positive thoughts started trickling in. If I don’t help them now, who else will? All this trouble is for a noble cause. I should not leave them high and dry.
Life is not only for money and comforts. It has got a much deeper meaning.
My inner sense started whispering that doctor’s coach must be nearby. I started to move again with a gradual pick up in my strides. One more vestibule was crossed and I could see to my delight that I was in the threshold of victory! I was right in the entrance of the a/c coach!
A police guard posted there stopped me. He said that one is not supposed to enter the coach without a valid ticket. I had explained the situation and tried to convince him. He went inside and came back with the TTE.
He was a nice man and understood the problem. “Let me talk to Doctor Sahib, and find out whether he is willing”.
He went inside confidently, but came back in a few minutes with a sad face. “Sahib is feeling too much tired and don’t want to come”.
I felt quite miserable. I had all the reasons for giving up. No one can blame me. Things were just not happening in spite of my best efforts.
However, my inner voice had a different logic. “The darkest hour of the night happens just before the day break. Do you want to waste all your efforts till now? Don’t you want to see the streaks of day break?”